Dearest reader,
I used to do this "blogging" song and dance for a while some time ago. It was fun, and engaged parts of my brain that sleep all day now, so I guess you could say it's really an issue of flow: this blog is the thought-Viagra intended to open the passageways for my creativity-blood to get to my brain-penis. Looking back on that sentence, I really don't think there would have been a more eloquent or appropriate way to express that. An auspicious start, indeed!
The medium is utterly fascinating, though. I get the motivation. It's the product of an individual's need to put his or her thoughts out into the world and for people to see them and respond to them. It's the worst kind of intellectual exhibitionism and it comes, in my estimation, from any combination of A) an inflated sense of self-importance and B) panicked loneliness.
Welcome to my shiny new blog, which I will be calling Under. Don't get any ideas, the title isn't meant to be a statement (or even a suggestion) of a theme; there will be absolutely none of that. I chose this title because it represents not only my favorite preposition, but my favorite prefix. Between all the weird idioms (and aren't we all suckers for weird idioms?) that feature it and its ability to just take the piss out of just about any adjective or verb, it's just excellent. Also, you'll probably be underwhelmed, so I want to be able to subtly plant that seed in your head to preemptively dampen your disappointment. Finally, it sounds like it could be the title of a Dinosaur Jr song, and that rules.
If I can get past that first-post hurdle which has claimed so many would-be recorders of their scattered thoughts like some virtual Charybdis, I'll write about things like music, film, being in my late twenties, my will-they-or-won't-they relationship with alcoholism, video games, food, politics, books, and ironic reappropriation. I might lay down some fiction. All of this, at least, until I sell out and this space becomes a celebrity gossip blog and moves to famousbabiesandtits.blogspot.com. Give it a week or two.
I kid. Obviously, the realistic best-case scenario for this blog as a success in the medium looks something like this: somewhere in the mid double digits of unique views and an eleven cent check from Google every few months because two or three people accidentally click on ads that I'll eventually cave in and post once I know a few of my friends have stumbled on to this under the guise of "just wanting to see how they match my content". I can say safely, then, that this is a personal endeavor and not a get-rich-excruciatingly-slow scheme. Still though, it'd be cool if you read it now and then and click on the ads once they appear if you're still around. My early guess is that they'll be for discount antidepressants, dvd box sets, and knives.
So there we have it. A non-binding, non-verbal, non-contract. I write, you read. Enjoy the parts of me that I will be limply tossing into the ether for untold tens of people to accidentally discover and scoff at. By way of not selling myself short, I'll make this promise to you here today: at least some parts of it won't be the absolute worst.
Tom
No comments:
Post a Comment